brokenhearted

If you have been following me on Facebook, you know that we had to give up our puppy Wrigley. Timmy was SO allergic that even after 2 benadryl, a nebulizer treatment and 5 hours away from her while at school he still couldn’t breathe, and was a runny, sneezy, hivey, itchy, rashy, wheezy mess. This was NOT was supposed to happen. We had him allergy tested when the whole food allergy thing happened about 2 years ago and he turned up negative for dogs. That, plus the fact that he easily spends 6-8 hours every week with his BFF Jack’s dog Holly at their house. She’s a golden retriever too. And before I put the deposit down on the puppy I made him literally rub his face all over her coat and nothing happened. Not a sneeze, not an itch, nothing. I figured we were home free. We were not. It could be the puppy dander (which is different than adult dog dander), but whatever the cause I couldn’t put Timmy thru that daily and I couldn’t feel good about pumping him full of meds to try to control his symptoms. So she had to go. The breeder even offered to take her back for 6 months to see if his allergies got better when she was bigger, but I couldn’t do it. What if he was still allergic and we had to give her up again? And I couldn’t do it to Wrigley either. She needs a forever home.

I know we only had her for 3 days, but I fell totally completely in love with her (how could you not) and I am totally heartbroken. It’s not just not having her here anymore- although the house seems so different without her already- it’s all the time and love I put into researching, shopping, reading golden retriever forums, signing her up for training, coordinating with the breeder and transport, surprising the boys at Christmas, finally getting her and imagining all the years of fun and love with her in our family. All gone. I just miss my puppy girl so much.

She is the best puppy- she only had one accident in the house, was on a great schedule making it 5hrs during the night, sweet, smart (she already learned “sit” on command either hand signals or verbal command, and knew to sit right away after coming inside from a walk), and so cuddly. The boys are all doing better today. They’re adjusting way better than I am.

She has a new family with two little girls and a great mom & dad to take care of her, and even a big brother dog. She really hates being left alone so I’m hoping that the other dog will help with that while mom & dad are at work. They’re local and were so wonderful telling us we can visit whenever we want. So it’s good and bad that we’ll see her grow up. Good because I’m sure at some point I’ll stop crying when I think about her and will want to see her (and the boys are so excited that they will be able to visit!) and bad because I really want her to be in OUR house. So watching her grow up someplace else is so hard.

I’m trying really hard to get back to work today to keep my mind off of her (not really working). And trying to think of all the “negatives” about having a dog- the messes, hair everywhere, taking her out for walks in the rain/snow/freezing, traveling issues when we go away, barking, nipping, worrying about her getting sick, etc. But that’s not really working so much either. Who really would’ve thought I would be so attached after just a few days of her here. I couldn’t even stay outside and say goodbye as they drove away. And on top of everything else, I’m now sick. Great timing.

A big thank you goes out to everyone who called, texted, facebooked, emailed or messaged me yesterday. I just can’t talk about her without crying so I didn’t answer many of those calls, emails, etc. but I really appreciate everyone’s support and love. I’m sure I’ll be better soon.